震耳欲聾的樂聲間，聽見自我的聲音

PUP - Sleep In The Heat

I was feeling a little bizarre
The day that I buried my family car
In the scrap metal wrecking yard
在廢鐵處理廠燒掉我家老車的那天我感到有些非比尋常

And I've said so many goodbyes
In the twenty-five years that I've been alive
畢竟25年來我道別過很多次
And I don't know why this one was so hard
但我不知道為什麼這次特別難熬

And every time when I go back to my apartment
而每一次回到我的公寓
All I wanna do is get stoned
我都只想呼麻放鬆
And I'm sick and tired of blacking out on my carpet
我已厭倦在地毯上昏睡
And waking up all on my own so I brought you home
起床後還孤單一人 所以我決定帶妳回家

You started falling apart
Six months after you moved in
妳住進來的六個月後 身體狀況每況愈下
And I should have known from the start
如果我一開始就注意到
That things would be different
也許結局會有所不同

It's not something that I can fix
這並不是我可以解決的病情
If I could do anything, you know I would
如果我幫得上任何忙 妳知道我一定會做
If this fucking vacation would come to an end
如果這該死的耶誕假期早點結束
Maybe then you'd be normal again
也許妳就會回到從前的狀態

Last week, when I went back to my apartment
上週 我回到公寓時
You were looking so stoned
妳看起來像石頭一樣紋風不動
The day after Christmas, you acted so different
聖誕節的隔天 妳的樣子非常不對勁
You just wanted to be on your own
妳只想待在自己的空間
So I bought you medicine, went to the vet and
所以買藥給妳 帶妳去看獸醫
Cashed all of my savings and loans
花光我的積蓄與貸款
But it was too late, you were letting go
但一切都太遲了 妳已決意放棄

Whoa whoa oh oh oh
Whoa oh oh
Whoa oh oh oh oh
Whoa whoa oh oh oh
Whoa oh oh
Whoa oh oh oh oh
Whoa whoa oh oh oh

And nothing I say will make it okay
無論我說什麼都無法彌補
You just sleep in the heat and repeat
妳只是永無止境地在保溫燈下熟睡
You're wasting away
妳只是漸漸地消亡
And nothing I do is gonna save you
無論我怎麼做都無法拯救妳
I'm trying my best, but you can't even
我盡了最大的努力 但妳連
Look at me or talk to me or tell me what's happening to you
看著我或跟我說話 甚至是告訴我妳怎麼了都辦不到

Yesterday, I went back to my apartment
昨天 我回到公寓
To see how you've been holding up
想看看妳狀況如何
You hadn't been eating, I thought you were sleeping, but
妳還是沒有進食 我以為妳在睡覺 但
You're not waking up
妳再也沒有醒來
And I want you to know that I'd spend every bit of my
而我想讓你知道 我願意花光每分
Pitiful savings and loans
我少得可憐的積蓄和貸款
Just to see you again
只為了再見妳一面
But I know I won't
但我知道不可能

PUP 來自加拿大多倫多，
成軍於2010年，
曲風偏向Pop punk與Hardcore punk，
在2010年後龐克搖滾逐漸式微走回地下後，
他們算是走出新風格與新氣象的樂團。
如果有看Netflix美劇"怪奇物語"應該會對MV主角不陌生，
事實上這是它們第二次跟Finn Wolfhard合作，
前一支MV"Guilt Trip"也是由Finn主演。
這首歌收錄在PUP 2016年的第二張專輯"The Dream Is Over"中，
專輯名稱源自於主唱Strfan在第一張專輯後的巡迴，
因為過度密集的演唱而導致喉嚨受傷，
當時醫生診斷後告訴他未來沒辦法再唱歌了。

"Sleep In The Heat"是一個真實故事，
歌曲關於主唱Stefan在MV"Mabu"燒掉自家老車時，
因為MV拍攝需求他們租了很多爬蟲類動物，
讓Stefan遇見了他取名為"Norman"的變色龍，
而後因為Norman生病必須拔除舌頭，
但失去舌頭後Norman拒絕進食最後離世。

如果有養寵物的人大概都無法抗拒這首歌吧，
非常寫實地描述了飼主那種願意花費所有積蓄，
只為再見到心愛的夥伴一面的心情，
儘管我們都很清楚，
那是不可能的。

所以下輩子見囉我親愛的發卡，
每天都很想你...